19

Tomorrow is the day- I'm the big birthday girl! I remember when I was little getting so excited for "my" day. Being apart from family and old friends will surely be bittersweet. 365 days from now and I will no longer be a teen...I don't even want to think about the number 20. I will be ANCIENT!
:)

As I was walking back up from the cliffs after an early run this morning, I was struck by the sudden thought that my life, God-willing, is almost a quarter of the way spent. The next house I live in will most likely be my own. The relationships I am forming right now will be the ones I call upon for the rest of my adult life. My so-called "what I wanted to be when I grow up" will look like a career; I'll be paying my own bills and making my own food (cringe!). In four short years, I could be thinking about a family.
Nineteen years have passed since I was first introduced to this world, and yet, somehow I feel as though we are only newly acquainted. I am just beginning to wrap my head around the things my elders have been pressing on me throughout my entire life: You really are who you hang out with. Being able to say no takes courage. How you spend your time determines how you spend your life. Externals easily fade while the quality of the heart remains.

To nail it down to the biggest question on my mind: What have I done with my life so far that has been truly significant to the eternal kingdom? Besides building up my own Hall of Fame, piling with memories, accomplishments, and useless "stuff" endlessly, where have I placed those things that moth and rust cannot destroy? Sure, I've been on a couple of mission's trips, I've been a consistent member of the church, and heck...I'm attending a Christian university. Shouldn't that count for something? Unfortunately, and all too often lately, I've been convicted that I really am missing out on this thing called life. Everything that I thought significantly mattered doesn't anymore. I am being stripped of my religion, my theology, my pride, my agendas, my security blankets, my assumptions...and, in turn, I am beginning to taste soley of the One who is truly everything.

So, on my 19th tomorrow, let's celebrate this. :) Love you all.

"When religion has said its last word, there is little that we need other than God Himself. The evil habit of seeking God-and effectively prevents us from finding God in full revelation. In the and lies our great woe. If we omit the and we shall soon find God, and in Him we shall find that for which we have all our lives been secretly longing." -A.W. Tozer